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What I’ve Learned from Our Dog Max

I have grown to have a fond appreciation, some might even equate it to Love, for our dog, Max.

Anyone who knows me well, knows how monumental this admission is for me to make. It’s not that I don’t like dogs, they’re just a pain sometimes.

Max as a Puppy

When we were on our adoption journey with Hope, our son Reagan and daughter Katelyn were begging for a dog. I was able to use the excuse that we don’t know if Hope likes dogs, so we need to wait until she comes home to live with us. It was a given when both kids prayed each night before bed, to hear, “Please God, help Hope like dogs.”

The first thing Reagan and Katelyn asked Hope when we arrived back at the airport from China was, “Hope, do you like dogs?” Of course she didn’t understand a word they were saying, but their faithful prayers would ultimately be answered.

Max Knows and Loves His Family

Our family travels a fair amount in our work with Faces With Names. Max starts to get noticeably nervous when he sees the suitcases coming out and being packed. He has stayed with a couple different dog sitters during our travels.

The first one Max stayed at was close to our house; he broke out and made his way back home, and was found sitting at our front door after a couple hours search.

The next dog sitter has worked out great. But after the first visit, Max came home with a few war wounds. He is a little snippy around other dogs. I think there was a Great Dane that ultimately was annoyed by our little ankle biter.

If Our Dog Feels this Level of Trauma, How Much More Do Kids?

I don’t pretend to know how dogs feel or think, but it is visibly noticeable how Max’s demeanor changes when he senses he is not going to be with his family.

What I’ve learned from our dog, Max, is the trauma orphan and vulnerable children must experience when they are separated or removed from their families must be unbearable.

Faces With Names exists so Orphans and Vulnerable Children Will Know the Love of a Family

All is well with Max when he knows he is loved, cared for and with his family. Will you help us make this a reality for orphans and vulnerable children, who right now, at this very moment are feeling the trauma of not knowing there is a family to love and care for them?

Your year-end gift helps us help orphans and vulnerable children know the love of a family. Your online giving must be completed by Midnight on December 31st to get a 2017 tax deductible receipt.

Click Here to Make a Year End Donation Now

Attention: No medical bills will be paid for heart attacks from me admitting I love our dog.

Wishing You a Happy & Blessed 2018,

Eric Mills

www.faceswithnames.org

Meet our New Board

I could not be more excited about our new Board of Directors, who will be leading Faces With Names into our new season of ministry.

About six months ago, I began working with a consultant to bring more clarity to the mission, vision and message of Faces With Names. In some of our early conversations, the topic of Faces With Names becoming it’s own 501c3, Non-Profit Organization was discussed.

We began to pray and discuss if this was the right next step for Faces With Names. During this same time period, at various times and occasions, I believe God put the names of people on my mind as possible board members. Each time, I wrote these individuals names in the note section of my phone, under prospective board members.

Faces With Names is blessed to have such talented and gifted leaders as members of our new Board of Directors.

Once we made the decision to pursue our own 501c3, I began to reach out to the people on my list. In many ways, I could see how God was putting the puzzle pieces together with each new board members gifts and talents. My prayer has been for the exact right people to say yes to becoming a board member for this season.

We have reached a defining moment for, Faces With Names.

I believe we have assembled a leadership team that can help take our ministry efforts to a new level. We not only have the experience and expertise of great business and ministry leaders, we have people who are passionate and have personal experience with Foster Care, Adoption and Global Orphan Care.

Will You Help Us, So Orphans and Vulnerable Children will Know the Love of a Family?

The reality for every organization trying to make a difference in this world is, the reliance on generous people to make their mission and vision possible.

As we have just experienced Christmas Day, where families go to great lengths to spend time together, will you help Faces With Names with our mission and vision, so more orphans and vulnerable children will get to experience the love of a family next Christmas?

Click Here Now to Make a Year End Donation

It is now my distinct honor and privilege to introduce you to our new Faces With Names, Board of Directors

Cheering You On In Christ,

Eric Mills

 

Meet Our New Board Of Directors

Rena Gainey – Manager: Leadership Development, Global Talent Development, Leadership Development Solutions for John Deere

Rena currently trains the top 100 leaders, including the CEO and his Executive Team at John Deere. She is a certified John Maxwell Coach and Trainer. Rena has traveled to over 30 countries through her job and on mission trips. Her heart has been captured by the country of Burma, where she and her husband adopted an orphanage just outside of Yangon and now are the proud US parents of 41 wonderful kids in Burma. She has made a life-long commitment to these children by pouring into them financially, emotionally and spiritually.

Kathy Hoeck – Owner – KLH Grant Services, LLC

Kathy’s KLH Grant Services team, offers strategies for developing and implementing a successful grants program. Her team is passionate about working with nonprofit organizations who are committed to meeting the spiritual, physical, and economic needs of those suffering around the world. Kathy’s team has helped clients raise millions of dollars–enhancing the mission and service they offer their constituents. Kathy is an adoptive mom and a grandmother to adopted grandchildren.

Randy Johnson – Realtor – Addison & Maxwell Real Estate Brokerage

Randy is also a Co-Founding Member of JFour Partners, LLC. A California-based, commercial development company. Specializing in acquisition, development, management and sale of commercial projects. JFour acts on behalf of land owners, developers and investors to manage all aspects of development.

Josh Keltner – Owner / President – Concrete Solutions Inc.

Concrete Solutions, Inc. is a full-service concrete company in all aspects of commercial concrete applications. Concrete Solutions has been serving clients in Oklahoma, Arkansas and Kansas for over 14 years. Along with Josh’s leadership role at Concrete Solutions, he is also a real estate investor, home builder and a serial entrepreneur. He is passionate about helping others grow and build businesses.

Mark Kochner – Chief Operating Officer – Premier Consulting Partners

Mark has served in executive roles of growing mid-sized organizations as well as numerous roles in an organization ranked as the 5th largest privately held company according to Forbes magazine. Mark is passionate about equipping individuals and organizations with the necessary tools that will allow them to thrive in and through cycles of change. Mark is an adoptive dad.

Eric Mills – Co-Founder / President – Faces With Names

Eric is an ordained pastor and obtained his M.Div. from Asbury Theological Seminary. Through his role in ministry, Eric has traveled to over 30 countries working with strategic partners to spread the Gospel. Through Eric & his wife Susan’s own adoption journey, which brought their daughter home from China in 2012, a passion and calling for church orphan care ministry began. Through Eric’s work with orphans and vulnerable children around the world, Faces With Names was started.

Reneé Terrill – Global Impact Coordinator – Westside Family Church

Reneé manages the relational and communication components for global partnerships for One Life —an orphan care ministry of Westside Family Church, in Shawnee, KS. This ministry currently serves orphaned and vulnerable children in South Africa, India, Laos and Thailand. Her role includes program evaluation and assessment at all their sites in SE Asia and South Africa. Reneé also coordinates global travel for team trips and serves as a liaison between US and global partners for their Adopt A Village program.

Scott Turner – Lead Pastor – City Church

Pastor Scott, along with his wife Mary, are the Lead Pastors of City Church in Bartlesville, OK. Scott has over 20 years of church planting and pastoring experience. Scott is passionate about reaching people with the message of the Gospel and equipping people to become fully devoted followers of Christ.

Navigating 5 Key Challenges in the Adoption Process – Part 1

Adoption, at its very core, is a deeply emotional topic.

Whether the motivation to adopt is based on infertility, or a God-given call to bring an orphan or vulnerable child into your family, there is a chasm of deep seeded emotions involved before you ever begin the adoption process.

It is not uncommon for couples to consider the thought of adoption for many years, prior to taking the first steps towards their own personal adoption journey.

This passing of time, prior to adoption, can stem from the lingering hope of biological children, spouses not being on the same page or simply not knowing the first steps to take to bringing a child into their family.

This series of articles is designed to address 5 Key Challenges many couples face when considering adoption.

Commonly speaking, women tend to be ready for adoption much sooner than their husbands. 

So even though the common agreement to pursue adoption is one of the key challenges many couples face, we are going to proceed with this article as though our couples have mutually agreed to proceed towards adoption.

Mutual agreement on adoption does not necessarily guarantee smooth sailing towards the adoption goal. It only leads us to the first challenge and decision many couples face.

What Type of Adoption Should We Pursue?

TYPES OF ADOPTION

Domestic Adoption

  • Foster to Adopt:

This is a form of adoption where a child will be placed in your home as a foster child, with the expectation that he/she will become legally free and available to be adopted by the foster parents.

  • Private / Independent Adoption:

Prospective adoptive parents in Private or Independent Adoptions are advised by an adoption attorney, instead of working with an adoption agency. You will want to check with your state to determine if a private or independent adoption is allowed.

  • Agency Adoption:

Agency adoptions involve the placement of a child with adoptive parents by a public or private agency licensed or regulated by the state.

Public agencies generally place children who have become wards of the state for reasons  abandonment, neglect or abuse.

Private agencies are sometimes run by charities or social service organizations. Children placed through private agencies are usually brought to the agency by a parent or parents who have or are expecting a child they want to give up for adoption.

  • International Adoption:

International Adoption is where an individual or couple becomes the legal and permanent parents of a child who is a naturalized citizen of a foreign country. An international adoption is also referred to as Intercountry Adoption or Transnational Adoption. In such an adoption, the prospective adoptive parents must meet the legal adoption requirements of their country of residence and also of the country whose nationality the child holds.

  • Hague Adoptions

International adoptions in many countries are regulated by The Hague Conventionon Protection of Children. The Hague provides guidelines to agencies in order to protect the best interests of internationally adopted children. It will be important to check with your adoption agency to determine if the country you are interested in adopting from, is a Hague Country.

In Part 2 of our series we will be tackling these two critical challenges:

  • The absolute first person you need to talk to about the adoption process (other than your spouse, of course)
  • How much money you really need in order to qualify for approval from an adoption agency (it depends, so this will be very valuable information)

OBLIVIOUS!….?

Oblivious, that was me! I don’t think I should have been. At the time, I was serving as an Outreach Pastor, my wife and I had just completed a three year adoption journey to bring our daughter home from China and our church had participated in Orphan Sunday.

Just over a month after we brought our daughter home from China, I attended my first Summit Conference, put on by Christian Alliance for Orphans. This particular year, the conference was held at Saddleback Church in Southern California.

Through our own adoption journey and my role as an Outreach Pastor, God was really stirring in my heart to engage our church at a deeper level to care for orphans. Because of our own adoption journey, the focus we had presented to our church was primarily on adoption. I also began to realize, many of our international ministry partners were already caring for orphans in a variety of ways.

One of my goals at the conference was to research and learn ways we could begin to implement an orphan care ministry at our church. I was especially excited to attend one of the breakout sessions at the conference entitled, Building Church Ministries 101: Launching a Church Orphans’ Ministry.

There was a large turnout for this particular session as many churches had interest in engaging more into the orphan care crisis. What I quickly learned in this session was, the audience was mostly made up of lay people who had a passion for orphans. It didn’t take long to sense a common frustration amongst many of these lay people about the lack of support from their pastors about orphan care ministry.

Now there might have been more pastors present at the session, but they likely were staying quiet like I was out of fear of not making it out of the building alive.

Even though I was a pastor myself, I could certainly understand their frustrations as I was experiencing some of this same type of pushback or lack of interest in my efforts to introduce an orphan care ministry.

This was my first experience to witness a widespread lack of support amongst pastors on a topic that couldn’t have a more clear Biblical mandate, caring for orphans and widows in their distress.

Just one day later at the conference, I can safely say my world was rocked, in a big way. We watched the debut of a brand new documentary called, Faultless: The American Orphan. I don’t know how I could have been so oblivious to the foster care system in my own country, but I was.

I had no idea that at any given time in our country, there can range between 400,000 to 500,000 children in the custody of the state. Of this larger number of children, at any given time, close to 100,000 of these children are eligible to be adopted. Simply put, the parental rights of those 100,000 children have been terminated.

The title of this documentary speaks for itself. These children, through no fault of their own have been neglected, abused and are in situations bad enough that those outside their worlds notice there is something dreadfully wrong.

The sad reality is, our society and culture have masked that we actually have orphans living amongst us. I understand the sensitivity of how we label these children, but have we gone so far to protect them that now we don’t even know they exist? These children go to school with our kids, they live in our neighborhoods, but do we even know they are there?

What I was so struck by was the heartbreaking statistics of vulnerable children who are placed into the foster care system. Let these statistics sink in:

  • 80% of children in foster care have physical or mental health issues
  • 70% of the current US prison population has spent time in foster care
  • 80% of death row inmates have been in foster care
  • 65% of the US homeless population has spent time in foster care
  • 51% of foster kids will be unemployed after aging out of the system
  • 71% of girls who have been in foster care will be pregnant by the age of 21
  • 60% – 70% of those caught in sexual human trafficking in the US have spent time in foster care
  • Only 3% will attend college

This information rocked my world! Again, how could I be so oblivious to the realities of children who live in the smallest of rural communities, to the largest cities in our country, and everywhere in between?

In light of these staggering statistics, where does The Church fit into this crisis? The sad reality is, the frustration with pastors I was exposed to in the breakout session at Summit many years ago, is one I have now experienced on a wider scale personally as we have worked to engage churches in orphan care through our ministry, Faces With Names.

Having served previously as a pastor for many years, I understand the overwhelming work load many pastors already are facing. Having served as an Outreach Pastor, I also understand the numerous requests pastors and churches receive on a weekly basis.

A common response I often receive from pastors is, we are already doing too much. My question is, what if you are doing too much of the wrong things? Other pastors I speak too are narrowing their focus to such a small degree, there is no room to even consider another ministry option.

Either way, so many churches have eliminated a sacred space and left little to no room for something so close to the heart of God.

The unfortunate reality is, we will either deal with these children now, or we will deal with them later as adults. If Christian families and churches would be willing to step into their lives at a young age, there is more of a chance to see healing and restoration in their already broken lives.

Statistics show, the longer a child is in the foster care system, and the more placements or homes they have lived in, the more likely they become one of the unfortunate statistics listed above.

If we deal with them later, they will likely be the ones selling drugs in our towns, stealing our cars, breaking into our homes, selling their bodies voluntarily or involuntarily and making up a large percentage of those filling our prisons, living homeless on our streets, and requiring assistance from the government.

I often hear from DHS workers how they have worked with grandma, mom and now the children. The generational cycle of poverty, destruction and addiction is not only robbing these families of their God given potential, it is often blinding them of the enormous love God has for each and every one of them.

I love the statement my wife Susan once made and we now use as motivator in our ministry efforts:

“We believe, every time a vulnerable child or orphan is placed in a loving, healthy Christian family, through foster care or adoption, they are literally being snatched out of the hands of the enemy, and given a hope and a future.”

I know the hearts of most pastors is to reach the lost and to see peoples lives transformed. When we pray for revival in our towns and in our churches, are we only praying for those who will come in and make an immediate positive impact in the lives of our churches? These new people we have been praying for will provide leadership, they will serve, they will tithe, they won’t cause the pastor any headaches or additional work.

If we are honest with ourselves, this would be our selfish prayer. But what about those vulnerable families and kids who are not easy to deal with? If The Church is really going to be the answer to the foster care crisis, it will likely be more compared to taking up our cross daily for the sake of others than it will be easy wins.

Amazingly enough, that is exactly what Jesus called out for His followers to do, take up our cross daily. Not a popular subject most of the time, even to pastors. I write this blog with a continued desire to bring awareness to pastors and churches, there are vulnerable kids and families who desperately need our help!

But I must admit, I also write this blog with a bit of frustration at pastors who are ultimately the gatekeepers of what ministry transpires in their churches and are unwilling to even consider caring for orphans and vulnerable kids. I certainly understand how orphan care can seem like a very peripheral ministry idea.

But consider this, as pastors, have you ever tried to explain to a person who has never tithed before, why it is important to tithe? Tithing is a concept on many levels that makes no human sense and is often hard to explain why one should participate.

I equate orphan care for the church in the same way I equate tithing for the believer.

It might not make sense, but in God’s economy, it is better to participate than to not participate.

I love this quote I heard Andy Stanley make as he was addressing foster families at his church, NorthPointe.

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“Foster Care is the best and most significant ministry we do, and I really, really believe that. It will never be huge, but it will always be significant. It will will never make sense financially, but we are going to do fund it anyway. It means there aren’t going to be as many positive stories as there are heartbreaking stories, but that is just the nature of ministry. I really do think even though initially it seemed like a little sideways energy, a little bit off focus of what we do in terms of planting churches. I really believe there is not a more significant ministry that we do. Which means from my perspective as your pastor, as a church planter, of all the things I’ve seen, there isn’t a more important thing that we do as a church.”   Andy Stanley

I appreciate this heartfelt expression from Andy Stanley on the importance and significance of churches participating in caring for vulnerable children through foster care. The reality is, starting an orphan care/foster care ministry already parallels many of the ministries you already have in place. I have said to many pastors now to date, all we need is your support.

You already have people in your church who are passionate about caring for orphans and vulnerable kids. Support them, unleash them, and watch how God blesses every aspect of what you are doing through your church.

There is this pesky little verse we find in Matthew 25:40 where Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”

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To those lay people who are frustrated, stay encouraged, and pray for your pastor. For pastors who are not interested in orphan care/foster care yet, would you ask God how He might want you to lead your church in caring for the most vulnerable amongst us? For the pastors and churches who get it, thank you! It’s not easy, but it’s worth the effort.

Every negative statistic from foster care represents an individual. Every one of those individuals has a face, with a name. Their real life stories can be swept into the abyss of negative statistics, or they can be embraced by loving families, from loving churches who can introduce a Jesus who can bring healing, restoration and salvation to all things broken.

I was Oblivious! Are you?

Faces With Names, serves as a catalyst ministry to engage and equip churches to create the culture of orphan care through foster care, adoption and global orphan care. To learn more about how we can serve your church to help care for orphans and vulnerable kids, please visit our webpage: www.faceswithnames.org

Craig Groeschel – “Orphans Embraced” Every child in need has a face, a name and a story.

 

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